Being a member of the LGBTQ+ community isn’t easy, especially when it comes to dating. Your dating pool could be limited for various reasons, especially if you live in a smaller town. Fortunately, you can find true love or just fun easily thanks to the power of the internet. In this article, we’ll introduce you to the best lesbian dating sites out there, but also cover the basics of:
- Building your profile
- Online safety and communication
- Staying healthy
The 6 Best Lesbian Dating Sites
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Overall best lesbians site for dating
- App also available
- Large member pool
- Simple design and concept
Elite Singles
Best lesbian date site for professional women
- In-depth personality survey
- Various ways of interacting with others
- Strong member pool
eHarmony
Among the top lesbian dating sites that are non-exclusive
- Regular updates
- Advanced matching methods
- Good value for money
Kinkoo
Best lesbian online dating site for kinks
- All kinks accepted and encouraged
- Affordable
- Nicely designed
Scissr
One of the best dating sites for women by women
- Completely free
- Great community feel
- Men and trolls unwelcome
Lesbian Dating Sites Reviews
Pink Cupid
Overall best lesbians site for dating
- Demographics: 60% female
- Payment Method: Paysafecard, credit card, bank transfer, PayPal
Pink Cupid ranked number one on our list mainly because it was made exclusively for women and because of its affordability. A year’s plan for the Gold subscription will cost you only $8.33.
As far as the users are concerned, be aware that just because it was made for women, it doesn’t mean it’s not inclusive. Even though this is one of the best dating sites for lesbians, you can still run into some men.
Women who visit the site are mostly young, between the ages of 18 and 34. The registration process is pretty thorough, as you’ll have to fill out all the available fields, describe yourself and your ideal match, add three photos, and list your interests and hobbies. You’ll also be required to verify your email address.
If all of this sounds like a bore, you’ll be happy to know that you can simply join with your Facebook account.
Moreover, while you can still have fun while using a free account, it won’t get you very far. As a standard user, you’ll only be able to read messages that came from someone with a membership. You’ll also be missing out on the convenient IM feature.
Lesbian dating sites reviews from users expressed satisfaction about how many active members there actually were. They also love the fact that they ran into almost no fake profiles or bots even after using the site for a while. Most are unhappy that you have to pay for messaging, though.
Pros
- + App also available
- + Large member pool
- + Simple design and concept
Cons
- − You need a membership to chat with others
Her
Best lesbian dating app for all sexualities
- Demographics: 100% female
- Payment Method: Mobile phone, credit card
This is one site that created a space exclusively for women of all sexualities and gender identities. To sign up, you’ll need to use your Facebook or Instagram account. Though sharing your other social media sounds scary, it’s required in order to verify that all users are authentic.
However, the process isn’t perfect because the app is known to recognize more “masculine” women as men and not allow them to make a profile.
The sign-up process is a little different from other lesbian dating websites in another way, too. Instead of you manually putting in your info, the site will automatically build your profile by adding your birthday, name, and profile photo.
If you want to change anything, you can once you’re done registering. When it comes to memberships, messaging is unlimited, but free users can only text mutual matches and friends.
You also won’t be able to view other people’s full profiles as a free user. That means you won’t know their distance from you, anything related to their personality, or basically anything other than what you can see in the photos.
According to the site’s stats on lesbians dating online, users with 8 pictures had the most success in finding matches. Aside from pics, your profile can also include text, your age, height, name, gender identity, sexuality, friends list, and relationship status.
While users were unhappy with the fact that they can’t do much without a paid membership, they loved the active community. For example, some of them were able to find out about events that other lesbians would be attending.
Pros
- + Active community
- + Female exclusive
- + Verified users
Cons
- − Have to pay for the full experience
Elite Singles
Best lesbian date site for professional women
- Demographics: 50% female
- Payment Method: PayPal, credit card
If you’re a highly educated woman who’s fed up with dating people she can’t connect with on an intellectual level, you’ve come to the right place. Elite Singles was made specifically for the purpose of matching intellectuals and academics, hence why most of its members have a degree.
Elite Singles wouldn’t be considered one of the top lesbian dating sites if it weren’t for the in-depth personality quiz you need to complete upon registration. Regardless of gender, most users are 30+. This means a certain air of emotional maturity is present, which suits anyone looking for something serious.
When it comes to contacting others, you can do so through one-on-one chats, you can like someone’s photo, or you can send them a wink to let them know you’re interested. The wink and like features are great for the introverts among us who simply don’t like initiating chats.
As far as lesbian dating sites reviews from users are concerned, they were generally positive despite this not being an exclusively lesbian platform. You can still filter through users easily and find other women.
Pros
- + In-depth personality survey
- + Various ways of interacting with others
- + Strong member pool
Cons
- − Even basic features require payment
eHarmony
Among the top lesbian dating sites that are non-exclusive
- Demographics: 47% female
- Payment Method: Credit card, PayPal
eHarmony may not be specialized for LGBTQ dating, but it sure is worth your time. The website has been around for a while, allowing it to perfect its matching methods and include all sexualities and genders without sacrificing the quality of matches.
To this day, the company continues researching new matching methods and regularly updates the platform according to them. When registering, this lesbian dating app will ask you to complete a compatibility quiz to increase your chances of finding a suitable long-term partner.
Otherwise, you’ll only need around ten minutes to complete the registration process. The process is cut short with the option to connect via Google or Facebook. Though you can do some things with a standard account, you’ll be missing out on the full experience.
For example, you can only start conversations with generated questions, and you can’t continue the conversation even if your match replies. If you’re worried about the costs of the full experience — don’t be. eHarmony offers long membership packages in the hopes of saving you money while still finding you a perfect match.
As far as the lesbian dating sites reviews for 2022 are concerned, users noted they were pleasantly surprised with how accurate the personality and compatibility quiz is. They were finally able to start the romance they had always dreamed of thanks to this site.
Pros
- + Regular updates
- + Advanced matching methods
- + Good value for money
Cons
- − Standard account offers limited access to the site
Kinkoo
Best lesbian online dating site for kinks
- Demographics: Fewer women than men
- Payment Method: PayPal, debit card, prepaid card
There’s no shame in having kinks and wanting to explore them further. If you’re aiming to spice up your sex life, Kinkoo is the place for you. While you can download the app for free, you will have to pay for a membership to gain full access to it.
This wouldn’t be one of the best lesbian dating apps if paying for a membership ended up being a waste of money, though. With a membership, you’ll be able to swipe indefinitely, see the profiles you accidentally dismissed, increase your privacy levels, and even see who liked your profile. Of course, you’ll also be able to chat with other members.
The one thing Kinkoo lacks is an active community where you can share your ideas and experiences with other people. Communication is centered around one-on-one chats, which is good for those who like to get straight to the point.
The sign-up process includes a questionnaire detailing your kinks and BDSM role. It should be noted that this is not one of the best dating apps for lesbians who aren’t cis women, due to the lack of gender options.
Users said they were able to find what they were looking for and that the app is good for hookups, but that they’re disappointed by the number of bots present.
Pros
- + All kinks accepted and encouraged
- + Affordable
- + Nicely designed
Cons
- − Possibility of running into bots
Scissr
One of the best dating sites for women by women
- Demographics: 100% female
- Payment Method: /
Scissr was made for LGBTQ+ women by LGBTQ+ women. This means the developers knew exactly what the needs of their target audience are and how to meet them. It also means only women are welcome, regardless of their sexuality or lesbian identity.
The app is great for those who are just getting into lesbian dating, as it allows you to get the feel of the community. This also means that the app isn’t designed for just dating. You can also find friends, talk to like-minded people, look for hookups, as well as find long-term partners.
You’ll need to use your Facebook account to register to this lesbian dating app, so as to verify your identity. This is a necessary precaution against men who try to sign up. As far as your profile is concerned, you’ll need to add your basic information and a short bio. Some users use this space to describe their ideal partner, too.
You also have the option of uploading your pics, but that’s not all. You can edit them, add filters, crop them, and adjust the positioning during the upload process.
Scissor can best be described as a more elegant lesbian Tinder in terms of design. Interacting with others is simple. When you find a profile you like, you can add it to your wish list or tap the crush button. If the user is online when you see their profile, you can send them a chat invite.
Pros
- + Completely free
- + Great community feel
- + Men and trolls unwelcome
Cons
- − Not a large dating pool
Your Guide to Dating Women Online
Buyer’s Guide
Navigating the world of online dating as a lesbian can be tricky. Your sole existence is often fetishized online, and you can run into people posing as someone else just to have the chance to talk to you. Hopefully, this guide will help you find what you’re looking for and improve your experience.
What Are The Benefits of Using the Best Lesbian Dating Sites On the Market?
- Convenience: You don’t have to search far and wide for a new partner, when potential matches are just a swipe or message away.
- Privacy: If you’re not fully out or just like your privacy, you never have to worry about anyone knowing what you’re doing.
- Something completely new: Why not expand your social circle? Online dating is perfect for meeting people you wouldn’t have met otherwise.
What Are You Looking For?
Before you jump into online lesbian dating and start looking for new matches, figure out what you’re looking for first. To narrow down your dating app and site choices, decide if you want a long-term relationship or just some fun.
This way, you won’t be wasting your time or anybody else’s. As well as that, you’ll be mentally prepared for your next adventure and in the company of people who want the same thing. In short, you’re much less likely to stumble into heartbreak and disappointment.
Let’s not forget that there are girls who just want to be part of an active community. If this sounds like you, you might want to check out Her or Scissr, as they’ll definitely help you learn more about the LGBTQ+ community and get more involved. Who knows, you might even make a few new friends along the way.
Communication
Communicating on lesbian dating websites is pretty similar to the apps and sites we mentioned in our reviews. However, you need to remember not to move the conversation to a third-party site too soon. Also, don’t give out a lot of personal information to potential matches right away, especially your phone number and address.
No matter how perfect someone seems online, you never know who’s behind the screen and what their true intentions are until you’ve been chatting actively for a longer period of time.
When you keep the communication bound to the lesbian dating site, you have evidence of the person’s behavior and can easily contact the site’s support if anything goes wrong. Because the exchange happened on their site, they have to react and keep you safe.
Your Profile
Regardless of which app or site you sign up for, you’ll need to build your profile to increase your chances of finding a perfect match. In some cases, you might even need to complete a personality survey.
Increasing profile visibility should be your main goal, and this is how you can achieve it:
- Choose a name. Most lesbian dating apps and sites will give you a choice between using your real name and choosing a pseudonym. It’s up to you, but if you choose the pseudonym, make it creative and easy to remember.
- Don’t leave the bio blank. A short, genuine, but a sweet bio will always make you stand out. This is how you attract potential matches, so don’t be afraid to make your personality shine.
- Add photos. Don’t be afraid to show off your personality as well as your looks. Adding pics will also show people you’re real.
Privacy
The best thing about online dating is that you can keep things as private as you want. To do this, all you have to do is follow a few simple tips:
- No recognizable features in provocative photos. Most queer dating apps allow and encourage posting provocative photos, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be careful. If you do choose to send them or post them, make the background neutral and leave out your face, tattoos, or any other distinct features.
- Use pseudonyms. There’s no need to share your real name, especially if you’re not fully out. Nicknames and creative pseudonyms are the perfect way to stay anonymous while still having fun.
- Don’t overshare. Your address, phone number, and other social media accounts shouldn’t be shared until you meet the person. As well as that, there’s no need to go into personal history when you just start talking to someone.
- Public meetings first. Even if you’re using a lesbian hookup app casually, always meet in public before you get to the bedroom. See if the chemistry’s there, if the person is who they claimed to be online; if there is no chemistry, feel free to walk away at any given moment.
Safe Sex
Just because you can’t get pregnant from having sex with women, it doesn’t mean you’re not susceptible to STDs. In fact, women who have sex with women are at risk for herpes, genital warts, and even chlamydia. The risk increases if both women are on their periods.
Here’s how you can stay safe once you’re off lesbian hookup sites and in the bedroom:
- Use condoms for sex toys. Use a new condom every time you’re penetrating a new body opening, wash your sex toys with soap and water in between sessions, and always store them properly.
- Use a dental dam. STDs can be transmitted through oral sex, too, and the risk increases if anyone has a sore or a cut in their mouth or on their lips. Using dental dams or avoiding oral sex is always a good idea in these cases.
- Wash your hands. There are STIs that can be transmitted through touch, and the risk of contracting them is higher in the context of lesbian dating. Make sure to wash your hands before and after you play with your partner.
- Use lube and latex gloves. If you and your partner are into fisting, make sure you have plenty of water-based lube with you, and don’t do it with your bare hands. Latex gloves will keep you safe.
- Don’t douche. Though it may seem tempting, douching will only cause problems. The vagina cleans itself, so you should only wash the vulva. Otherwise, you may end up with irritation and soreness.
Who Uses Lesbian Dating Sites?
Unsurprisingly, lesbians aren’t the only women who you may come across on dating sites and apps. You can also encounter plenty of bisexual women.
Be aware that bicurious and straight women also might be present. Most women in this category are trying to explore their sexuality and figure out who they actually are.
The Type of Lesbians You Might Encounter
To make this new experience easier for you, we decided to compose a list of the most common types of girls you might encounter. However, it should be noted that there are more than a few labels — and that labels aren’t everything.
This list is here as a general introduction and generalization, serving to demystify the world of lesbian online dating a little. Don’t take it as anything more than that.
- The Sport Dyke: they like sports and are usually athletes. Softball and basketball tend to be their favorite sports.
- The Butch: they usually have short hair and more “masculine” traits.
- The Lipstick Lesbian: they’re usually more traditionally feminine with long hair, dresses, and makeup.
- The Activist: they’re the ones on the front lines of fighting for equality. You’ll find them doing their best to challenge homophobia and change the world for the better.
Dos and Don’ts
Just like in every other dating situation, lesbian online dating involves some dos and don’ts that you should follow in order to have the best experience possible. If you follow them, you’ll be more likely to find a good match sooner, as well as avoid disappointment and heartbreak.
- Do be open about your sexuality.
- Don’t talk about your ex-girlfriends
- Do actively listen to your date and respect their boundaries.
- Don’t pressure her to meet your friends right away.
- Do engage in the conversation.
- Don’t blog and post about everything you two do.
Problems You Might Encounter on Lesbian Dating Sites
Despite most platforms being safe and full of like-minded people, there are still things you should watch out for. These problems tend to stem from lesbians being fetishized in pop culture and society.
- Couples looking for threesomes: Some couples think that joining dating sites for girls is the perfect way to find another girl to have sex with. If you’re there for one-on-one dating, avoid them entirely.
- Straight girls trying sites out just for fun: Though anyone can and should explore their sexuality, it’s not a good idea to flirt with a straight girl if you are even remotely open to something serious. Falling for someone who can’t love you back only leads to heartbreak.
- Men posing as women: Yes, some straight guys actually pose as women on popular lesbian dating sites to try to “convert” lesbians or just to have fun. The good news is that most sites and apps today have a verification process, but you should still be mindful of who you talk to.
Conclusion
Hopefully, our reviews and guide have given you an insight into what you can expect on dating sites for lesbians. If you’re new to the LGBTQ+ community and online dating, things might seem scary, but we promise you they’re not. If you take the necessary precautions and use the safe sites and apps we recommended, you might just find your next partner.
FAQs
On lesbian dating sites, who should message first?
Some sites have a policy of men or women always messaging first, but when you’ve got two girls in the picture, that policy easily falls apart. The simplest answer to this question is that it doesn’t matter. If you like someone, shoot them a text. If you’re too shy for that but would still like to initiate something, you can always make use of virtual gifts and winks that most apps and sites feature.
What kind of questions are asked on lesbian dating sites?
Most of the apps and sites we reviewed ask you to add personal information upon registration. Here, you’ll be asked about your sexuality, gender, age, and location. Some dating platforms are more thorough and even ask you to complete a personality survey so they can help you find suitable matches more easily.
Why do men get on lesbian dating sites?
The influence of pop culture and porn has made lesbians very appealing to straight men. So much so that some of them fetishize the existence of lesbians and fail to see them as actual people. Some straight men take this fetish to such extremes that they create fake profiles on the best lesbian dating sites just to get closer to them.
There are also cases where straight men aim to “turn” a lesbian straight, because they believe she just hasn’t met the right man yet and that she’ll change her mind thanks to him. This, of course, invalidates a girl’s sexuality completely and is utter nonsense.
